I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
how do flat chested girls get laid?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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