im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
