It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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