Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
