but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
