What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
