Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
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