a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Randomize