and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
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