On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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