It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize