Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
You are the jesus of drinking
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I'm sobbing to NWA
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
