I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
