My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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