I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
this boner is exhausting
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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