SEEEEXXX PLEASE
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
