We're facebook friends in real life
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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