Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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