yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
