Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize
