spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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