I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I just had sex on a roof
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
