i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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