Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
