Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
