I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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