Pappa wants mamma naked
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Boobs are out for the taking
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
