Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I licked your asshole in confidence.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
