I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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