I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
you traded sex for a burrito?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
