i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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