Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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