Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
