she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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