May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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