Pappa wants mamma naked
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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