So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
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