if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Buhtt sex?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
