i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Randomize
