either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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