my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
