Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize