I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Randomize