Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Tell her she can't have a vagina
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
