I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
