the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
