I didn't shave. On purpose
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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