that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I have tasted many bathrooms
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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