how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize
