just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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