Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
