Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
