I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
